•  my boys had their 4 month and 3 year appointment yesterday, both are healthy! D weighed in (at 4 months 3 weeks) 21 pounds 7 ounces, BIG boy! And B weighed in at 33 pounds!! both got shots and it was really sad cuz they both cried and B went first and when the nurse said "okay Driver's turn" B screamed "NOO, not Drivers turn, its scary, he cry!" Hes very protective of his little brother :(
• Driver has an appointment with a surgeon on September 12th, the doctor yesterday said he has a hernia and will probably need surgery to fix it....we will find out more on the 12th but needless to say im a WRECK over this idea...the doctor tried reassuring me "oh its minor, out patient surgery" but im sorry there is nothing minor about sending my baby into surgery...praying for a good outcome with his appointment...im scared...
• we had Boston in the ER on friday because he stuck something up his nose....it was a clear plastic round thing they put on the inside of ktichen cupboards so they dont slam when you shut them...it was very tramautic for him and VERY far up in his nose...thankfully that ended well and he is fine, albeit he told me the next morning "i all better now!"
• i got a great picture of my boys together and ordered a HUGE 20X30 canvas of it for the living room, i will share a pic after Mike and I hang it up tonight, im in LOVE with it!! ill sound snooty now but geeze people are missing out on my great talant of photography... ;) lol
• despite all my worries with driver and a possibly surgery and this weekend being hectic i am amazingly blessed and happy and content right now, we have so many new things coming up in september, lots of possibly news about a new base/etc and im excited to share it when we hear some news!
• my sister is engaged and planning her wedding for may 2010, im BEYOND excited for her!!

ill share a picture of the canvas later!! <3

but vote for my boys!!! <3

http://www.parents.com/app/sharemy/photoDetails.jsp?photoId=275200146

http://www.parents.com/app/sharemy/photoDetails.jsp?photoId=275200145


you just go to the rate thing above their pictures!!

A Mother’s Story

MyHeritage: Family trees - Genealogy - Celebs - Collage - Morph

MyHeritage: Look-alike Meter - Vintage photographs - Genealogies

well look at that i ALREADY am forgetting to blog...i really need to make this part of my normal nighttime online routine cuz it really helps just letting it all out.

My life has not been pretty eventful the past few days so not much to write about....oh wait i forgot...last monday i woke up after a GREAT night sleep and said to myself, after getting a smiley baby out of his crib and being greeted by my VERY happy toddler "good morning mommy!", i thought "this is going to be a GREAT day!!" little did i know that that afternoon while at the gym Dh would do something to his ankle which would cause us to sit in the ER while he got a splint put on a very sore ankle. The doctor just thought it was a sprain but it is STILL swollen a week later and bruised and he still cant put weight on it...so needless to say I have been doing everything this week, im exhausted, to say the least. Which also brings me to my next vent about this past week...

for about a month now i have been feeling unhappy...sad....i had been blaming it on my husband...nice huh, even though he has been pretty good about helping me and being there for me through this "being a mom to two thing" i STILL blamed it on him. Well this coming week has made my mood go down even more AND has set my mind into a whirlwind of worry/anxeity/despair, i could go into detail about all my feelings but i wont be judged, i just will say that i do NOT want to harm myself or my children! (OR my husband ;) ) this is merely a unhappy feeling that is slowly making me feel like my life is being sucked into a black hole...im overwhelmed, sad, and just really am missing my old self. If you know me you would know that im normally a VERY happy person, i have some anxiety issues that i have grown to cope with and learned to not let them control my life (well until this past month...) but all in all im a "go with the flow" "take it as it comes" kinda gal...i love change, i love my life and my family and lately that is just not how i have been and i dont like it. I stare in the mirror and dont know who I am, i dont feel like myself and i want to change that. I have tried positive thinking and trying to put my heart and mind into things i love but even that as fallenthrough (photography post below...) I have FINALLY come to the realization that this is ME, MY problem , i need to take control before i begin feel to much hopelessness that i dont know where to turn, so im talking to my doctor tomorrow...im scared, scared of being judged...scared of not being taken seriously...scared that im destined to feel unhappy forever...

i just want to feel like myself again and jump out of this black hole that i am being sucked into...

our day went pretty well today! 

Today was day #1 of the gym for me and i have to say it went VERY well. Both boys cooperated for me, Driver woke up from his nap at 3:15 and i was able to have Boston and myself ready before he got up so i could just feed him, grab the bumbo seat and jump in the car! It went pretty smoothly and i left the house at exactly 3:30pm...TOTALLY my plan!! woohoo! Im getting better at this "mom of 2" thing! I wa able to do 30 minutes on the treadmill which was super nice, slow paced, i just did "fat burning" so it wanted my hr to stay at 130, so i fast walked at 3.5mph for those 30 minutes, pretty nice! I plan to go tomorrow AND friday, than again on Monday, ive decided since i felt SO good afterwards that im going to do M, T, W, and Th!! no guarantee i'll have my "bikin body" back BUT i will feel better about myself that it the major plus side of this. (also when we left Dh had to go pick up this guys keys so he could get his uniform out of the car...i was standing there with him and as we left and turned the corner Dh was kinda behind me and saw a couple guys run over so they could see me walking away...LMAO totally made my day!)

Let's see...oh today is kinda (we didnt do it all day monday or tuesday, lol) day #3 of potty training Boston! It is going VERY well!! he had ZERO accidents, 4 successful pees on the potty all day and even stayed dry IN UNDERWEAR while we went to the gym!!! Makor milestone for us, he will be 3 in september and i really thought hed be in diapers till next year cuz he is so dang stubborn...but i just decided to put him in underwear and see how it goes and its going awesome, im so proud of him!!! He is proud of himself too and that makes it so nice. Still diapers for nighttime and no poop on the potty yet so we will see how that goes.

Oh gym update for future reference, todays weigh in before gym 7.23.08 weight:136lbs ill weigh myself again on monday (its my weigh in on a board im on for weightloss/getting into shape)